Thursday, May 26, 2011

The Myth that comes with the Tide

I didn't buy CD's until sometime after 2002. I didn't even own a CD player. Don't even ask about DVD's. Then I started going through the used stuff at Amoeba (whatever, it was on the way home for a couple years of toiling, then it wasn't and I never missed it again) and sometimes I'd find something total bad ass that was $1.00, like ANTI's entire collection on one CD (they were an early punk band from Redondo Beach, way before your time). Well, before I knew it, I had a box full of CD's that someone decided sucked ass and sold, then no one evidently wanted them used either, and they were marked as low as possible I guess, and along I came. Man, I got some good stuff for a buck a pop. Saccharine Trust, Mood of Defiance, TSOL, Minutemen, Detonators, Christian Death, Vandals, Dag Nasty (when they were living outta Doug's moms house in Manhattan Beach) mostly all that old South Bay / Southern California stuff that was made before shit like Hot Topic and Blink 182. It makes me wonder about motorcycles too. History played out differently. Remember when everyone in the know said, and you'll remember this well, "All those Big Bear Choppers and OCC bikes will be for sale super cheap in ten years..." But, that never panned out. I still see ridiculous prices on these hulking RevTec powered bolt waggons. (Hell, I don't even know what to really call them? The owners like to call them choppers, but they're more like "everymans-a-celebrity chopper(s)" if anything and by that I mean expensive abortions build for a passing fad. Even if that fad is still on re-runs, 40 times a day on the Discovery Channel, which is an oxymoron to boot, because the only thing I discovered while watching some of those shows was how retarded those guys really really are, even at the little things like making coffee at their home!)
The Angry Samoans kick ass! Rodney, not so much...
Not looking too happy.
What about todays Fourty-Eight with a gas tank the size of my schlongs bladder? What about Honda's new "chopper" the FURY? Yamaha likes to call their "Raider" bikes "modern classics" but they're still just water cooled metric cruisers, that still cost too much. Who do you think they're going after with a name like "Raider" or "Fury" or "Dark Custom"? I guess I just haven't watched enough Lord of the Rings movies (evidently that where all the CEO's are getting their bikes names from?) Next years may very well be the "Unicornica" or "Elfster" or maybe even "Analator" (I meant to say Annihilator) Everyone dreams of a stripped down, inexpensive, standard air-cooled bike as a starting platform for a home build bike, but there's no such thing. It's a myth in todays "new" bike arena. Go into a dealership and ask to see their selection of "standard" bikes. I bet you get either a.) a raised eyebrow of confusion or b.) a huff of disgust. "Come on you cheap bastard, buy a plastic-chromed 1800cc VTX and bring it to the dealer for every service imaginable because you'll never be able to figure anything on this bike out on your own." (That's from experience, spin the bottle truth, I have a kinda-newer Shadow and the carburetor has no less than 50 hoses attached to it. I started pulling them off one by one until the bike stopped running. It was like a game of Jenga!) I thought of chopping it to hell, but decided it would look like a naked-turd instead of just a turd at the end of the day. I'm still looking for a 90's KZ1000 Police bike too.
(Yes. It's a real HD youtube video ... I shit you not.) Google "Gymnist & Dark Custom" you'll find it.
July 21, 2010 - Harley-Davidson reported in a public financial statement that they shipped 112,720 motorcycles in the first 6 months of 2010 Wait. Is shipped, "SOLD" I don't know..., a 15.2 percent decrease compared to last year’s 132,849 units for the period. That's still "shipping" over 626 dreams a day!
"I don't know. Try anything... we need the sales NOW!"

"Skaters can't afford this shit, find SOMEONE who can!"

But those figures are form 2010, here's some new figures I grabbed off the web. I can only assume they're real since, who would go to the trouble to make up a bunch of dummie numbers (except maybe me?). Top 10 Motorcycle and Scooter SALES for Q1 2011:
  1. Honda 3913 (still down 9% from 2009 same Q sales)
  2. Yamaha 2518
  3. Triumph 1913 (up 25% from 2009, they must be doing something right?)
  4. BMW 1532
  5. Suzuki 1456
  6. Kawasaki 1384
  7. Piaggio 994
  8. Harley-Davidson 974 Sucks to be in 8th place. Less than eleven bikes sold a day?
  9. KTM 549
  10. Ducati 517
I think this snip from a review of a 2008-2009 Sportster pretty much sums it up in a nut:
"Suspension of 2008 and 2009 bikes needs upgrade. Some have experienced issues with minor oil leaks and/or piston rings not sealing for quite a while. Has a number of minor quirks, although all issues are easily worked out by a proficient owner or under warranty."
Now, who in the world ever heard of a Harley having oil leaks... tisk tisk tisk, that's unheard of.
So you have to be a "proficient" owner? or take it where? ... oh, to the Dealer.
So what "exactly" is my point. BUY USED.

1 comment:

Johnny No said...

Just in case you didnt see it brother ..... as I was flipping through channels this am I saw Lady Gaga playing a piano built inside a giant Unicorn !!!!! I kid you not ...... but I thought ..... where is Ladyhump when you need them ?????

See you soon hopefully.