Thursday, June 23, 2011

Sophomore Hi-Jinx! Gasser Lounge

Hey Mikey B! Hear yo' having a little party this weekend??? Cant wait to see it!!! Oh man, this is going to be good... 
(scroll all the way to the bottom and stop the music while you watch this...)
ike turner is roaming around in hell looking for someone to smack because he's so pissed he can't come to our two year anniversary!  lucky thing we're up here.  it's way more fun to drink and party than to feel the sting of that funky back hand!

a ton of work has gone into making Sophomore Hi-Jinx the best party yet, so if you have any other plans for this weekend, go ahead and cancel them.  grandma's 80th birthday? skip it.  your first born's baptism?  reschedule it.  liver transplant surgery?  tell them you'll get 'em on the next go 'round.  this shit is going to be epic!  we've got tons of drink specials, give-aways, and fun going on all weekend... and if you think you can not show up and get away with it... think again.  we'll fully revoke your Gasser membership there, bud.

friday night we have a very special event that is so special we can't even tell you about it.  all we can say is that if you're not here before 10pm, you'll be waiting in line.  seriously.  friday is going off so bring a belt to strap yourself in like friggin' helen hunt in twister.

saturday we have the My Beating Heart crew down here doing LIVE painting.  that doesn't sound cool to you?  well maybe someone will ride an elephant through the bar or maybe one of them will burst into flames.  who knows?  anything's possible with those freaks... especially since the most interesting man in the world started hanging out with them.  he doesn't always drink beer, but when he does, something's catching fire.  it's also bike night... and coincidentally the same night as Born Free.  bring your bike, keep your helmet on all night, and cross your fingers.  it's going to be bonkers!

sunday! sunday! sunday!  not sure if you read the FULL PAGE ad in the Easy Reader or maybe took a glance at the image above this email, but we've teamed up with Girlfriends Bikinis to bring you the sexiest white trash pool party you've ever seen!  picture this:  burgers sizzling over a half-barrel full of hot coals, plastic cups full of tasty cocktails and ice cold beer, an above-ground pool packed full of INSANELY hot chicks in TINY bikini's, and mike b.'s white trash ass running around doing what he does best- pouring booze down everyone's throats!

the folks from Pinkie's BBQ will be here cooking up burgers and brats and we convinced the city and the state to let us serve booze in the parking lot so uh, that means we got ourselves a party on our hands!!  who needs the beach?!  bring your swimsuit and a lawn chair and prepare for a day full of sun-filled mayhem.  you can even bring your dog because we'll have the whole parking lot fenced in.  doors open at noon.  as always, no cover charge.  just come thirsty.

and if you STILL haven't seen the promo video for Sophomore Hi-Jinx then go and check it out.  if we put this much effort into our video, then just imagine how much we've put into this weekend!  remember that rusty old bucket sitting in the parking lot for the last two years?  well she's gotten a makeover... and it's kinda like that chick in high school that you always wanted to hook up with but she had janky teeth and now it's a few years later and she got 'em all straightened out and she's lost some weight and you're not sure, but it looks like her boobs may have gotten bigger too.  she looks good.  happy anniversary to us.

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