Friday, June 22, 2012

Celebrities who'll NEVER fit into a Biltwell Lid ... jus' saying

"I like them french fried potaters but no matter how much lube I use I still can fit my head in no moto sickle helmet."

Often mistaken for just as old and ugly, Harry Dean Stanton. The forhead is the dead giveaway. The power of the crainum in this case was featured in an actual reality television show where Harris mind-meld (common referred to as the "mind melt") with a Tuna Sandwich and claimed "It's afraid. IT'S AFRAID!" 

Silverlake resident Chritina Ricci says she happy to play a bitch in any role, but realized she'd never be able to wear a 3/4 face helmet after seeing her melon in the mirror. We suggest; shave your head and just squeeze on a red swim cap. No cop will ever pull you over.

It's no stretch of the imagination to realize why Christian Slater's making molla in the Star Trek franchise. He's got a alien shaped watermelon above the neck and needs less time in make up than an average human who has to wear prostetics to achieve an alien looking physique. He's been arrested counteless times, beating his girlfriends, assaulting cops, cocain, etc. etc. Our suggestion? Just have NASA recognize your chromium dome as the 11th planet in our solar system and add it to the star charts. One day, it'll make a nice little moon base for 70's hot babes to have interstellar flings on! Oh yeah! (I wonder. Have you ever measured the gravitational pull of your forehead?)

"Are there any Brothers on this moonbase?"

"Only Will Smith, but his forheads so heavy he can't lift his face off the floor..."

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